I am horrible. I went to my friend's wedding yesterday, and even though I was happy for them, I kept thinking "Please don't let them get pregnant before I do". I know parenthood is not a race and I should be happy if I get pregnant, no matter when it happens. This was just such a tough week in terms of seeing people pregnant or with their children. Every time I saw a mother with a little child, I teared up, which is really unusual for me. Normally, I feel fine and tell myself my day will come soon. Lately, I have been wondering if I will ever get to be a mother. Logically, I know I can adopt and I would be just as happy with that option. My husband and I already discussed that if I am not pregnant by September that we would look into adoption. BUT I am wondering if destiny will conspire against me and motherhood will never happen. I care for my students, but I wouldn't want my career to be the basis of my existence.
Still, I don't want my friends to become parents before I do. Logical or not, I would feel like a huge failure if that happened.
Thank goodness my husband and I have this cruise to look forward to! I am supposed to get my next period right before we leave. My husband is bummed about that, so he is determined to get me pregnant before then so that my period never shows up. ;)
Good luck to everyone TTC!
Don't feel horrible! I do the same thing. I swear, more and more people have become preggers since we decided to start trying. My SIL is due on Friday, so that will be a fun/emotional day, I think!
ReplyDeleteThanks. We'll be next I think (hope). :)
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