Mama Drama/Family Drama

Hello! Not much new to report in regards to the baby. I had Taco Bell yesterday for the first time since before I was pregnant. Not proud of that, and I feel really guilty. I am just so sick of food and sick of forcing myself to eat the same stuff all the time. Taco Bell was the ONLY thing I could think of that sounded remotely tolerable. I don't know what's up with me. It's not like I am having morning sickness. I feel fine. Oh well. I guess I didn't realize mommy guilt started so early.

Also, I keep checking for a baby bump, but it still just looks and feels like bloating/pudge.

I had some family drama last week. My sister told me that she is going to return to school to become a legal assistant. I was very happy for her. She has been struggling a lot lately financially. Hopefully, this will give her better job prospects. Then, she told me that I would have to help more with my brother who has autism and lives in a group home. She is his legal guardian. I said, "Sure, no problem." I said I would help any way I could (I have always told her this), but I could not take time off work for meetings and whatnot. I am a teacher, so it is not easy to take off work in the first place. Secondly, I am having a baby later this year and all my time off will have to go towards maternity leave. She then gave me a guilt trip, telling me that she let me finish school and didn't bother me with helping then. I got really mad, a little bit at her for the guilt trip, but mostly at my parents. THEY should be doing all this stuff. THEY are the parents. Only pure selfishness has prevented them from being legal guardians for my brother. I called up my mom and kind of yelled at her. She said she would help, but my sister refuses to talk to her to tell her how to help. (My sister is seeing a therapist and he told her it might be a good idea to distance herself from my mom for her own mental health.) Great. Now I have to be middleman in all this drama. I really hate my family right now.

Sorry about that. Thanks for letting me vent. Have a wonderful week!