My baby bump at 14 weeks

Yay! It's here!

Some of this is bloat still, but the bump doesn't completely go away in the morning. :)

Baby is making 2011 turn into a GREAT year!

Yesterday I showed up at my school's registration. I wasn't required/paid to be there. I showed up mostly hoping to talk with the kindergarten teacher I would be working with this year to get to know her. She was super busy, so I wasn't really able to talk to her. But I got to see some of my students that I had last year! So cool! It made me excited to eventually meet my new students in a couple of weeks, which is good because I was kind of dreading going back to work before this. :)

Also, today I met my doctor! She is very nice and answered all my questions. I also got to hear the heartbeat again! Right in the 150s just like it was the last two times they checked. LOL This baby has a very consistent, strong heartbeat. I am still a little worried about getting the attention I want/need when I give birth. Part of me wants to go with a midwife because I know I will be their sole focus and they will fully support my desire for a natural birth. On the other hand, going with my doctor would be much cheaper (my insurance covers pretty much everything) and I like the security of giving birth in a hospital JUST IN CASE. I do feel better after meeting my doctor and seeing that she is very supportive of however I want to give birth. She also is totally OK with me having a doula. My insurance will cover part of the cost of having a doula, which is great.

I just got off the phone with a representative of my union. I wanted to learn more about how maternity works as a teacher. I have the option of taking 6 weeks paid leave and then 6 weeks more of unpaid leave. During this 12 weeks, the district will still pay its share of my health insurance premium. If I want to go even further and take a leave until the end of the school year, it would be unpaid and I would have to pay all of the insurance premium. I don't think I'll do that, but it's good to know I can take the rest of the school year off if I want/need to!

Update: I just scheduled my 20 week ultrasound for October 3! So excited! We will probably find out the gender then. (I can't imagine being able to wait longer.)

I feel so lucky/blessed to have things going so smoothly so far with this pregnancy. 2011 started out really crummy with the stress of work, the miscarriage, and then my old cat dying, but things are looking up BIG TIME. I thank God/my deceased relatives/my deceased cat Maxi or whoever is looking out for me from above.

Have a great weekend!

Yikes! It's official!!!

I told my immediate family and close friends. Now I just announced it to the world on Facebook! (Well, work doesn't know yet, but will soon.)

(M is my husband. My status update is kind of an inside joke because whenever someone would ask me when we were going to have kids, I would say, "Whenever science advances to the point where my husband can carry it for me.")

It's kind of scary, but also very exciting. This pregnancy and BABY feel so real now! :)

Mama Drama/Family Drama

Hello! Not much new to report in regards to the baby. I had Taco Bell yesterday for the first time since before I was pregnant. Not proud of that, and I feel really guilty. I am just so sick of food and sick of forcing myself to eat the same stuff all the time. Taco Bell was the ONLY thing I could think of that sounded remotely tolerable. I don't know what's up with me. It's not like I am having morning sickness. I feel fine. Oh well. I guess I didn't realize mommy guilt started so early.

Also, I keep checking for a baby bump, but it still just looks and feels like bloating/pudge.

I had some family drama last week. My sister told me that she is going to return to school to become a legal assistant. I was very happy for her. She has been struggling a lot lately financially. Hopefully, this will give her better job prospects. Then, she told me that I would have to help more with my brother who has autism and lives in a group home. She is his legal guardian. I said, "Sure, no problem." I said I would help any way I could (I have always told her this), but I could not take time off work for meetings and whatnot. I am a teacher, so it is not easy to take off work in the first place. Secondly, I am having a baby later this year and all my time off will have to go towards maternity leave. She then gave me a guilt trip, telling me that she let me finish school and didn't bother me with helping then. I got really mad, a little bit at her for the guilt trip, but mostly at my parents. THEY should be doing all this stuff. THEY are the parents. Only pure selfishness has prevented them from being legal guardians for my brother. I called up my mom and kind of yelled at her. She said she would help, but my sister refuses to talk to her to tell her how to help. (My sister is seeing a therapist and he told her it might be a good idea to distance herself from my mom for her own mental health.) Great. Now I have to be middleman in all this drama. I really hate my family right now.

Sorry about that. Thanks for letting me vent. Have a wonderful week!

I saw my baby!!!

What a fabulous day! I had my first ultrasound appointment today. My husband and I were so worried on our way there. The last time we got an ultrasound, it was to basically see an empty uterus after my miscarriage. :( Today's experience was so different! Baby measured a few days farther than I thought, so I am adjusting my estimated due date. Before I thought I was due 2/23. This was calculated based on when I ovulated. Turns out, I am actually due on 2/21 (based on last menstrual period), which makes me 10w6d. My baby measured 11 weeks on the dot today. The baby was moving around a lot too, which is really cool. I am so glad baby is growing and still has a strong heartbeat. I feel like the luckiest person alive!

Also, a lot of my clothes don't fit anymore. I start work/teaching in a few weeks, so I was worried about what I was going to wear. Problem solved! I bought 5 new shirts at Goodwill that are loose and comfy. I bought a pair of maternity pants and stretchy waistband shorts from Kohls, 3 more pairs of maternity pants at JC Penney's, and 2 belly bands at Motherhood Maternity. I think I am set until cold temperatures set in! (Then I will have to buy maternity sweaters perhaps.) I am pretty thrilled also because I didn't break the bank with all these purchases. Also, maternity pants look better on me than regular pants. Who knew?

Good bye, Old Girl

Well, my cat Maxi died on Friday, July 22. She was 19 years old. I kind of knew she was dying, but I was still kind of in denial and debating whether to put her down or not. She made the choice for me. She died peacefully in her sleep. My husband buried her next to a little tree in our backyard. Today, I ordered an engraved rock to put on her spot. I am also working on a memorial video/slideshow and photo album. I am posting this picture in loving memory.

                                       Maxi, about 5 years ago, when she was still very playful. :)

I miss her so much. She was my baby for so long. I can't believe she is gone. I don't think I will ever have a pet as great as she was. She was the pet that would cuddle me when I was sad. She was also the cat that would bite me (not hard) to communicate her displeasure with me. LOL I always loved her sassy, cranky nature. I am thinking that if this baby in my tummy turns out to be a boy, I might name him Max or Maxwell after her. That's how much she meant to me and will always mean to me. I hope she is at peace in "Kitty Heaven". I also hope that she knew in her final moments/days of life that I loved her very much. I did everything I could to make her last few days comfortable for her. I hope I succeeded. I hope she wasn't in any pain. I am just so thankful that I had her for so long and she had good health for the vast majority of that time. I am very lucky.

She will always be my sweet precious "Old Girl". :) I will never forget her. EVER.

I heard the heartbeat!!!

Yesterday, I had my first appointment. Both my husband and I were feeling crummy on our way there. He was feeling crummy because work that day was super stressful. I was feeling crummy because my cat's health keeps going downhill, and I might have to make the decision as to whether or not to "put her down".

Anyways, we sit in the waiting room a LONG time waiting for the NP to come in. She finally comes in and says something, "Oh, it's so nice to see you two again! Is this baby number 2 then?" We then tell/remind her that the first pregnancy (3 months ago) ended in a miscarriage. She says something about how it did seem like she just saw us and that must be why. She then goes into the usual pregnancy information. She asks me if I would like to hear the heartbeat. I say "no" right away because I was worried that it would be a repeat of the last appointment for my last pregnancy. Last time, she moved her wand around for a long time and could not find the heartbeat. Plus, I know that not everyone can hear the heartbeat at 8w5d and that doesn't mean anything is necessarily wrong. I was thinking I just wanted to wait until the ultrasound. She was surprised I said "no", but then keeps talking. As she talks, I think some more and decide that I would KICK myself if I didn't take this chance to see that everything is OK.

She gets me up on the table and starts moving the wand around. I am very calm, telling myself that it's not a big deal if she can't find it. After 1-2 minutes of moving the wand around, BAM! I instantly recognize a heartbeat that is too fast to be my own. 150 bpm! I start crying and I can hear my husband let out a gasp, so I know he is crying too. He recorded the sound on his phone. I love hearing the heartbeat!

I am not a religious person at all, but I am so thankful for this little miracle! Even though I am still worried about my cat, I feel more at peace knowing that at least my baby is OK.

Also, my first ultrasound appointment is August 1. Can't wait! :)